David and I have been married for over 3 years now and will be celebrating year 4 in August of this year! We have traveled together, supported one another, started a business, conceived, had a miscarriage, graduated college, conceived again, and now we have a beautiful baby girl. We married while still in College so we have gone through a lot of transitions with board exams (He is a RN and I am an Occupational Therapist), first jobs, second jobs and so forth. We have experienced some really great highs and endured through some really bad lows. But God is a healer and we have made it this far simply because of His grace and mercy. Some of our biggest challenges with being married have been in relation to communication.
Often times David thought that I was nagging and I thought that he just didn’t care. It wasn’t until recent where we could talk things over without it being blown out of proportion. All in all, women and men do communicate differently. No ladies, they do not read our minds. We have to say what we want and need and make sure that we do so in a loving way. At the end of the day we are only responsible for our actions and what comes out of our mouths and many times we have this impression that we can “change” our husbands. However, we do not have the power to do that. The minute you think you can, get down on your knees and pray to God.
I have asked God many times to mold me into the wife that He has called me to be and to mold my husband into all that he can be. We as women like to feel that we can control different things in our lives but in reality we have very little control over what happens. At any second, something can happen that can completely rock your world and there may be nothing we can do about it. Same thing applies to our marriage. We cannot control our spouse and we cannot control what they say or do. We can only pray and communicate with them (many times using their love language) to make our marriages successful. At the end of the day… Husband and Wife are on the same team. So the Coicou’s are winning and we are here to stay. Through the good and the bad, here we stand! God is the author of our book and we are just beginning!
Jasmine's Top Five
- Read 5 love languages together and implement it into your marriage.
- Pray together (It’s hard to be mad at someone when you are praying for and with them)
- Stop trying to control everything. Pray about it and let God do His job. He doesn’t need our assistance.
- DATE. Never. Stop. Dating.
- When apologizing, mean it. A great and effective way to apologize is to own your mistake, leave out the but, say what you did wrong, and say it won’t happen again. Focus on your wrongdoing, not hubby’s
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